Chapter 44: Healing
Part 1: Absent Recovery
TIME: 12:33 Equestrian Royal Standard Time
DATE: War Day 445/24 Sextus 1003 C.S.
LOCATION: Ponyville, Kingdom of Equestria
Grogar was now dead. We confirmed this. All of his undead creations, died with him. The citizens of Coldstream Landing had been freed, with no dead, and only a few injured, with none serious. Nor zombified.
The fuel arrived on the 14th, and we gassed up the airships and headed home. Superb dropped us off in Ponyville on the 19th, where we were all given a Hero's Welcome. I, more or less, went right home to Sweet Apple Acres and crawled into bed with Applejack (in the barn - remember, the house is a bit tight for me). Mac and Granny left us alone. Applebloom joined us, having missed her big sister terribly.
I slept for almost two whole days. The Flower Girls brought me food, even pizza, and sat and talked about the town and what I'd been missing. How Harv was now pregnant and married to Written Script. How Scoots was calling him Daddy.
I'd missed so much.
On the 22nd, I started my strength training and conditioning, to get back into shape. I was 34, now, and not getting any younger (though I wasn't entirely sure if I'd aged since 32, since I couldn't tell the difference between war injury and advancing age). I had to bring my body in line with what was expected of me.
The girls went about their thing. All except Fluttershy. She asked everyone to please leave her alone to grieve. She'd never properly grieved for Angel Bunny, or the things that'd happened to her.
I decided to run by her house (and I mean, run, as in running was part of my routine, now) and check on her. Someone did, once a day, just to make sure she wasn't swinging by a rope or something.
I knocked and entered without express permission.
K: "Fluttershy? You here?" I didn't need to announce who I was.
Fluttershy: "Back here." Came a very plain voice.
I followed it, and found Fluttershy in her bedroom, just sitting on her bed, staring out the window.
K: "Fluttershy?" I came in, and just sat next to her.
BIG mistake.
Fluttershy: "Oh! K! You.." She immediately nuzzled me.
WAY TOO AFFECTIONATELY...
Fluttershy: "..I-I was beginning to wonder if.. you'd come see me.. after that.. ever again..." She stammered badly.
K: "Of course I would, Flutters! You're my friend, and.."
She hopped into my lap, straddling me.
Fluttershy: "I-I know Applejack is your Leading Mare-"
K: "Fluttershy..?"
Fluttershy: "-and, and I know Luna does some things while you're asleep, especially if you sleep during the day-"
K: "Fluttershy.."
Fluttershy: "-b-but, I thought.. if I could find something special you liked.. something VERY special.. a Fetish.."
K: "FLUTTERSHY!" NO. NO, NO, NO, NO!
Fluttershy: "You'd have sex with me! And I could prove to myself that I wasn't totally disgusting!"
K: "Fluttershy! NO!" I said firmly. "I do NOT want to take advantage of you! And that's what I'd be doing! If I slept with you, now, after hearing all of that you said to Grogar - Flut.. Fluttershy, what the hell are you doing?!"
She was off my lap, and putting something on..
Fluttershy: "Webley Weaver was so.. VERY.. helpful.." She started, before turning around and showing me a perfect Marvel Black Cat costume she was wearing. "..is Capeshit your fetish, Anon - I mean, K----?" She said in a lusty voice.
I should mention, poor Webley is tied up in Fluttershy's closet with a 'HELP ME!' sign in her mouth, with her muzzle tied shut.
K: "You need help." I got up, pointing at her. "Stay back, Flutters. I mean it."
Fluttershy: "You're-you're right.. Marvel is so 2009.." She dove into the closet and came out in a Supergirl outfit. "How's this? Is DC Capeshit your fetish, K----?" Dripping with lust. "I can even fly, like her.."
K: "I'm getting out of here." I made for the door, only to be tackled from behind.
She was now in a Neko Girl costume.
Fluttershy: "Are Nekos your fetish, K----? Nyannn~"
K: "Fluttershy! GET OFF!" I pushed at her, but she was surprisingly strong.
Fluttershy: "Give me time, Monkey Sex God.." She was PURRING.
I managed to get away from her, and off-balanced-ly stagger to the door. Just as I got my hand on the knob, a whip entwined my arm and yanked it away.
Fluttershy was behind me, dressed as Indiana Jones.
Fluttershy: "Is the Temple of Doom your fetish, K----?" She drizzled out, then pointed up.
Snakes. Why'd it have to be snakes? Hanging from the ceiling by strings, actually. One of them gave me a rather helpless look, while another held up a tiny sign saying 'Call the Gendarmes! We're hostages!'
K: "FLUTTERSHY! STOP!" I yanked the whip away from her, and grasped the door handle, yanking it open.
Before I made it two steps, I had a bolas snare entwine my feet and send me crashing to the ground. I rolled over, and Fluttershy was now a Matador.
Fluttershy: "Ole! Is Bullfighting your fetish, K----?" She was giggling like she was crazy. I rolled over, and there indeed was a very large bull.
K: "Fluttershy...!" I looked around.. isolated as we were.. maybe.. "SOMEONE FUCKING HELP YOUR GENERAL! I.. NEED... HELLLLLLLP!" I screamed as loud as I could.
I wriggled away from the Bull, digging at my hip.. only to realize, she'd disarmed me already.
Defenseless.
I went for a sharp rock in her garden, looking back at the Bull.
K: "DUDE! Whoever you are! RUN FOR HELP! This isn't a GAME!"
Bull: "Tough luck, Pal. Th' lady paid me 5,000 bits for this gig!" He chuckled. "Hope you like a rough time!"
K: "FUCK!" I was sawing at the bolas string with the rock, to cut it loose, and finally got free, just as the bull charged.
Fluttershy: "I gotcha!" She swooped down, and pulled me out of danger just in time.
Dressed as Atomic Betty.
Fluttershy: "Are slightly-above-average Canadian cartoons your fetish, K----?" She giggled again.
I punched her. God, Celestia, help me, but I punched her with all my might, right behind the right ear.
We went crashing to the ground, right in her own vegetable garden. I got up, and ran in her back door, back to the bedroom.
K: "Sword.. I need.. AHA!" I grasped the Sword of Rainbow's Light.
Fluttershy: "THUNDER... THUNDER.. THUNDER.. THUNDERCATS... HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" She dove at me, just as I got to it, and we clashed.
She had a perfect replica of Lion-O's Sword of Omens.
K: "LUNA! GIVE ME STRENGTH!" I just KNEW at that moment, I'd dialled Goddess 9-1-1.
The bolt of Lunar enregy blinded her a moment, and I kicked her off of me with all my might.
K: "CELESTIA! GIVE ME STRENGTH!" I was overdoing it, but I NEEDED HELP.. and I used the brief Fire Power to slash her wall down.
I dove out of it, and landed back in the side garden, with the Bull.
K: "Now, you just STOP!" I pointed the sword at him, and he stopped charging. "Or I'll have you arrested under authority of Princess Celestia!"
Bull: "Uh, dude.. b'hind ya!" He pointed, laughing.
Fluttershy: "BY THE SECRETS OF GREYSKULL. I HAVE THE POWER!" Now, she was She-Ra.
K: "You think this is funny!?" I yelled at him, as I turned and clashed swords with her again.
Fluttershy: "Are 1980's Hero Cartoons your fetish, K----???" She asked, desperately.
K: "NO! NONE OF THESE ARE MY FETISH!" I screamed at her.
Fluttershy: "Just name it, Lover Boy..!" SHE kicked me, this time, and I went flying into the bushes.
I sat up, and she was charging me, now dressed like Brock Samson from Venture Bros. Complete with knife. She got as far as knocking me down, and pulling the knife halfway out.
Celestia: "STOP THIS, IMMEDIATELY!!" She BELLOWED from a rock just above me, having Teleported over.
I disengaged from Fluttershy, crawled over to Celestia like a little bitch, and hid behind her legs.
K: "Fluttershy's LOST it, she's trying to RAPE me!" I pointed at her.
Fluttershy: "NO! YOU'RE-GOING-TO-LOVE-ME!" She screamed, tears in her eyes, now dressed like the Dovahkin..
*PRZAAAAAAAAAAP*
No words. Celestia just flat knocked her dead cold with a bolt from her horn. I just fell back on my ass, and hugged my knees.
K: "I.. I.. I didn't want to hurt her.." I mumbled, as literally everyone started coming up the road.
Dr. Allcome: "K! What HAPPENED here!?" He looked between me and my tore-up jogging outfit, and an unconscious Fluttershy.
K: "Doc.. could'ya... lock her in a rubber room... please... I need a shower." I sniffled. "Someone untie Webley, she's locked in Flutters' closet.."
Rarity: "Come on, Darling. You can shower at my place." She looked stunned.
Dash: "I'll get Webley out!" She zoomed for Fluttershy's house.
Twilight: "What's going ON here!?" She looked at the Bull, who was now getting his bag together. "YOU! STOP!"
Bull: "Hey, my job's done, here, a-"
Three Gendarmes grabbed him, while another aimed a Chaffee at his face.
Chemical Splash: "Until we figure out what happened? I'm detaining you for questioning." She gave him a glare.
Bull: "I got rights, yanno!" He harumpfed, but didn't physically resist.
Chemical Splash: "Oh, indeed. And they will be observed." She shrugged, automatonically. "But right now, you're suspected of assaulting a member of the Royal government."
Bull: "I want my lawyer!" He sneered.
Chemical Splash: "You'll have one." She narrowed her eyes at him.
Rarity: "Absolutely dreadful, darling.." She put a hoof over my hip. "Come, come, now.. let Rarity get you all fixed up." She said herding me towards her botique.
All things considered, the mental health of yet another Element of Harmony was in a state of DIS-harmony. And, again, it somehow fell to me to take care of it.
At least I didn't end up.... FUCKING FLUTTERSHY!
(And here, maybe, you Memesters thought I forgot where I came from!)
[End of Part 1]
Part 2: Botique Unique
TIME: 13:43 Equestrian Royal Standard Time
DATE: War Day 445/24 Sextus 1003 C.S.
LOCATION: Ponyville, Kingdom of Equestria
Shower Sex with Rarity. With Applejack not up to it, and me nearly being raped by Fluttershy, the Fine Lady decided I needed some REAL love. And her mouth, her ASS.. it was a relief. Multiple times.
We were laying on her heart-shaped bed, naked (she usually was, I usually wasn't), enjoying a box of Bon-Bons. The chocolate kind, not the pony.
At least I was covered.
K: "Rarity.." I started.
Rarity: "Hush-hush, Darling." She put a Bon-Bon in my mouth. "You need to relax. When's the last time any of us got such a chance?" She snuggled up to me a bit. "Besides, with Applejack pregnant.. well.. I feel it's my duty as her dear friend and yours, to make sure certain.. needs are met." She pecked my cheek, more a friendly kiss than a lover's. "At least until you do the transfer and she can resume them." She rested her head on my chest as she said it. "I'm not surprised, you know.."
K: "About what?" I looked down at her.
Rarity: "After what we went through in the Herdiet Union." She went on. "I've not fully recovered, either.." She gently rubbed her lips with her right fetlock. "..and she had it worse."
K: "Yeah.." I didn't want to think about the aborted foal.
Rarity: "I had to watch. And listen." She slightly narrowed her eyes. "While they.. defiled her.. and.. at first, she screamed and cried every time. Then, she was just.. numb. They wanted our secrets. They wanted to know how your sword worked, your cell phone, all of it. We refused to talk. They.. threatened the foal. And Fluttershy said to them 'It isn't mine. It's something you put in me to make me suffer and I won't let you.' And they.." She looked away. "..clubs, rifle butts, their bare hooves.. until they were sure.." She sniffled.
K: "I can't imagine.." I shook my head.
Rarity: "When you dropped that Atomic on their air base, I was glad. I was happy. I felt joy, knowing they died.." She looked up at me. "Did.. they suffer?" After all, I'd know.
K: *Sharp inhale* "The ones closest to the blast were irradiated so heavily, they didn't feel a thing. They might've been dead before they even saw the flash. Those further out? They would have felt their skin melt from their bodies, but the radiation and initial heat wave would have fried their nerves before they felt much pain. Further still? Flash Blindness.. and if they were close enough, they would have suffered Radiation Sickness. It's a slow death as your organs basically break down and more or less melt. You end up defecating liquid intestine and blood, eventually. Fairly painless, but you do figure out you're dying.. and you just have to wait for it to happen. There's no cure once the damage is done." *Sigh*
Rarity: *Darkly* "Good." She set about polishing her right hoof, which still had a few nicks in it. "They deserved far worse." She shook her head. "Is that how the human version of the Herdiets would have behaved?" She asked, concerned.
K: "No, I don't think so. The Russian.. Soviet military is.. was a bit more civilized than that. I don't think their senior officers would have permitted it. Besides, they had much better ways to extract information, and with a near-90% success rate." I shrugged.
Rarity: "Not as reassuring as I wanted, but thank you." She hugged in to me. "They used me, too, you know. Not nearly as much, but one of them..." She looked down at herself. "...I can understand why Fluttershy might think herself untouchable."
She leaned in and whispered into my ear that one of the Herdiets liked to take liberties with her, but he urinated inside her before he did it. It explained why Doc Allcome had her on antibiotics. And why her pussy was off-limits.
K: "When you're fully healed.." I snugged her in, and gently played my lips along her horn. "..I'm going to be the first one back in there." A nuzzle. "Someone that cares. To show you how good it feels, once again." Talk about serving someone's needs.
Rarity: "Mmm.. the gentleman monkey, I let in my budoir..." She gave me a sassy nuzzle. "Feel better?"
K: "Leagues, my dear lady.." I hugged her. A tight, emotional hug.. as I saw Sweetie Belle peek her head in. "Cover yourself."
Rarity: "Mmmhmmm." She slid sheets over us, and without looking. "Snacks in the fridge, Opal's in your room, do your homework and you can go play, honey."
Sweetie Belle: "Uh-huh." She was giving me the evil eye. "Why're you in here an' not with Applejack?"
K: "Applejack is pregnant, Sweetie." I stated, looking over Rarity's shoulder. "And your sister is helping me feel better in a very adult way, after a very adult thing happened to me, earlier. Equally, I'm helping her feel be-"
Sweetie Belle: "Funny way'a sayin' my sister's yer side piece, K." She smirked evilly. "Sis, yer a-"
Rarity: "Finish that sentence, and you'll be grounded, young lady." She still didn't look at her.
Sweetie Belle: "Well, e'scuse me if everyone's talkin' about how yer havin' an affair with K, here, an' gettin' raw hot monkey sex, while Applejack's dealin' with puking and cramps." She huffed.
Rarity: "What.. did you just say?" She disengaged from me and telekinesis'd her robe over, whipping it on, dismounting the bed, and going over to her in one fluid motion.
Sweetie Belle: "Everyone's talkin' about it! I kinna feel a bit proud! At least yer not bangin' half'a the upper crust anymore!" She giggled. GIGGLED.
Rarity: "Where. Did. You. Hear. Such. Things." She was right on her, glaring at her.
I fumbled with getting dressed, sensing that snuggle time was long over and this was a family matter that I-
Rarity: "Don't you go running off!" She shot a look at me. "This is as much your doing as it is mine, Darling!" Sassy.
Sweetie Belle: "Does that mean he's gonna be suckin' yer horn again tonight?" She tilted her head.
Rarity: "Sweetie Belle.. where.. where are you learning these dirty things?!" She demanded.
Sweetie Belle: "Sis, come on, I'm 13." She shrugged dismissively. "I'm learnin' from everywhere. You don't help any!" She snorted at her. "I've read your secret diaries!"
Rarity looked absolutely horrified. For a moment, she couldn't talk, so I did. In Full Daddy Mode.
K: "Sweetie, you're not DOING anything like in those diaries, are you?" I cocked a brow at her, half-dressed.
Sweetie Belle: "A'course not! I'm not a whore!" She shot a look to Rarity.
Rarity: "SWEEITE BELLE!" She recoiled, wounded.
Sweetie Belle: "Aw, c'mon, sis. Don't act so hurt - so you're good at bein' a whore? Big deal! Ain't what I'm gonna do, but you sure make a lotta ponies real happy.." Sassy-sass. "..Tongue Queen!"
Remembering that Ponies do not have hang-ups about sex like Puritanical-based American society does.
Rarity: "SWEETIE BELLE!!" She exclaimed again.
K: "Sweetie, you're digging a deep grave, here." I warned her. "And not with me. I know what I am." I was fully dressed now, yeah.
Sweetie Belle: "Yeah.. shame you didn't get here a few more years fr'm now." She cocked her head to the side. "'Least with you, I know I can't get knocked up."
K: "Not happening." I pointed at her. "Not even after you're legal. It'd just be too creepy."
Sweetie: "Ain't what I meant. I'm sayin' I could'a got hold'a ya instead of my sister - then you could try a real lady fer once." She stuck her tongue out at Rarity. "I'd'a make him work fer it. Real hard." She wagged a hoof at her, indicating she would have expected me to be engaged to her, at the very least.
Rarity: "I-I.. YOU... I AM A PERFECT-"
Sweetie Belle: "WHORE!" She pointed with her right hoof. "Mom an' Dad had it right, just the wrong pony!" She huffed again.
K: "Rarity.." I shook my head. "..Sweeite, I hope you're not talking like this around the other kids."
Sweetie Belle: "Heck naw. My sis may be a whore, but no one's gotta know she's a whore masquerading as a lady. I'd be too ashamed." She shrugged and trotted off.
Rarity was standing there, jaw agape and twitching, eyes like pencil dots, making no noise, in a recoil-from-horror pose.
K: "Seems she's got you pegged, Tongue Queen Rarity." I smirked and put my head in my right hand, and that on my right knee.
Rarity: "Oh, YOUUU!" She levitated a pillow, and bashed me with it!
Despite finding out her sister was FAR more sexually educated than she first thought, AND had a very low opinion of her sexual escapades, Rarity did establish that Sweetie Belle had no intention of following in her footsteps in that regard.
She also doubled-down on her Tongue Queen title.
And I learned that we'd really been neglecting our families, if this was shocking news to Rarity. Even though both of them more or less played it off for uncomfortable humor, Rarity confided in me that she felt, now, that she'd let her sister down somehow, and would have to make it up to her.
Well, Doc Allcome did say to rest. Maybe mending a few fences is going to be part of that.
TIME: 17:43 ERST
Rarity: "..that's why I.." She lowered her head. "..was so upset at Pinkie's situation.." She said, holding herself in a little ball.
K: "I can't believe it.." I frowned. "..no wonder both your parents used the word 'whore' so much. THIRTEEEN!?" I was trying to comfort her.
Rarity: "..it's why I'm so determined to be the best and most devious Lady that I can be." She rolled over and let me hold her close.
K: "You certainly have your reasons. Locked in the basement the whole time?! And he didn't STOP?! Man, I had no idea.." I pet her mane. "..and he called himself your father?!"
Rarity: *Scoff* "He wasn't. Apparently, my real father is one of the Oranges. Meaning.. Applejack is my cousin. And.. Sweetie and Applebloom are related." She sobbed a little into my chest. "So, her FATHER is really her father.. he just isn't mine. Of course, since he wasn't genetically related to me, Mother was rather.. resigned to the situation. She knew. Tartarus damn her, she knew why he was in my bedroom every night.."
Sweetie Belle: "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?" She zoomed into the room, and threw her arms around her sister.
Who was giving me the tiniest grin, curled tightly in my arms, where Sweetie Belle couldn't see.
K: "Sweetie! You heard?" Part of me hated this.
Sweetie Belle: "R-R-Rari..ty?" She started crying, and Rarity rolled over and embraced her.
Rarity: "It's technically not incest, honey. Technically. By marriage, of course, it is.." She stroked her mane, and let her cuddle. "..don't worry, I won't treat you any different. You.. you don't have to call me Mom or anything." She pulled her back a bit. "Especially since.."
Sweetie Belle: "..yes?" Her lip was quivering, and she was already snort-hiccuping.
Rarity: "..you wouldn't have heard any of that if you hadn't been EAVESDROPPING!" She telekinetically lifted her out of the bed and set her down, and fixed her with a smirk.
Sweetie Belle: "Ah! AH! AAHHH!" The realization that it had all been an elaborate prank.. JUST hit her.
This is why I hated it, but, personally, I knew - as a parent - that just telling her not to do it, at HER age, wouldn't have done a lick of good.
K: "Sorry, Sweetie Belle." I shrugged. "I'm a parent, too.. sort-of.. I knew this would be the only way."
Rarity: "Did you learn a lesson, young lady?" She narrowed her eyes at her.
Sweeite Belle: "I.." She sat down.. and stared at both of us, more in amazement than anger. "So.. it was all a fib, right?"
Rarity: "Yes." She nodded. "Dad is Dad, Mom is Mom, they're just both horrible ponies that treated the both of us like manure." She shrugged.
Sweetie Belle: "Huh." She pondered this a moment, stood up, and went to walk away.. then turned, grabbed the spare pillows in the closet with her telekinetic magic, and proceeded to rapid-fire them at both of us!
K: "INCOMING!" I rolled off the bed (clothed!), grabbing a pillow myself.
Rarity: "AH!" She laughed, and returned fire.
Sweetie Belle: "I'MMA GETCHA BOTH FOR THAT!!" She was laughing, though..
After a heated artillery exchange at 600tpi, the three of us were laughing too hard to continue.
Sweetie Belle: "Okay.. okay.. you GOT me!" She hugged her sister. "Ah'm sorry I've been eavesdropping on ya, Sis. You're right.." She shook her head. "..where'd you come up with the idea, though?"
Rarity: "K pointed out to me that, as your SISTER.. just having a stern talking-to wouldn't have made much difference." She shrugged. "Not being your ACTUAL mom.. you'd have little reason to listen." She nodded. "I'm sorry I had to break your little brain like that, dear Sister, but I needed to teach you a lesson." She shook her head. "Because I really do love you with my whole heart.. and thinking about YOU is what got me through being a prisoner of war." She hugged her tightly. "And I want you to grow up and be better than I am.. no matter what."
Sweetie Belle: "A-aw.. sis.." She hugged back.
And.. sometimes.. MENDING those fences requires lighting a bonfire with the broken pieces!
[End of Part 2]
Part 3: Insanity's Spiral
TIME: 18:12 ERST
DATE: War Day 445/24 Sextus 1003 C.S.
LOCATION: Ponyville Hospital, Kingdom of Equestria
Doctor Well Wishes met me, and instead of his usual banter, he pulled me aside.
Dr. Wishes: "K, I'm not going to lie to you. Fluttershy is not well.. she's.. gone into this psychosis of some kind, and I can't even seem to talk to her. She's completely restrained.. she was trying to cut her own hair off." He shook his head. "Someone I used to know at the University in Baleston, Dr. Barn Mesa, is here to see her."
He introduced me to a chestnut stallion a bit older than him, with a buzz cut, moustache-and-goatee combo, and black-framed spectacles. He wore an orange shirt, lab coat, and tan slacks with low cut loafer shoes. He reminded me of someone.. but I couldn't put my finger on it.
He talked more like Syd Freeman from M*A*S*H. Did I mention before, I didn't really care for that show? A few episodes were okay, but it was largely unwatchable, to me.
Dr. Mesa: "General K. Nice to meet you." He nodded. "Dr. Well Wishes vouches for your.. supposed sanity." He gave me a bit of a look. Snark? Insult? Hard to tell.
K: "I'm just interested in helping Fluttershy." I shook my head.
Dr. Mesa: "Well, as near as I can tell, she's suffered a complete break from reality. She sees herself as undesirable, dirty.. and the only thing that's kept her going was a desire for revenge." He shrugged. "You're not fostering a healthy mental environment, General."
Dr. Well Wishes cleared his throat and shot Dr. Mesa a look like 'I've been through this with him and he's okay, leave it alone.'
Dr. Mesa: "..yes forgive me." He started pacing towards her cell. "Anyway, as you know, mental health is one of the least understood sciences in our world. I was blessed with a cutie mark that seems to give me some prowess over it." He looked at me. "A brain with a ribbon around it and a small plus sign." He described it. "Hence why I wear pants. I don't like to display something like that."
K: "Of course." I nodded. "So, how can we help her?" I asked, evenly, brushing off his attitude.
Dr. Mesa: "I'm still evaluating possible treatment options. Talk therapy, of course, is high on my list. We don't have much in the way of medications that can help her, you see. I can place her on a general sedative, of course, to keep her from having these outbursts..." He trailed off.
K: "M'hm.. go on." I nodded, staring at him as though I was hanging off his every word.
Dr. Mesa: "..and, of course, confinement until she's properly treated and not a danger to anyone." He shrugged, half-closing his eyes, as if out of intellectual boredom. "Obviously, she's entirely useless to your little war, now. She'll probably be at least somewhat unstable for the rest of her life. I don't recommend ever taking her out of Ponyville - possibly not for some years." He looked up at me, over the rims of his glasses.
K: "I see." I nodded. "Thank you, Doctor." I looked at Well Wishes. "Well? Care to have a cup of tea with me?"
Dr. Well Wishes: "Sure." He gave a nod and a very tiny grin.
Dr. Mesa: "Sounds wonderful." He grinned more broadly.
K: "I asked Dr. Wishes. Not you, Dr. Mesa. You have a patient to tend to, remember? I'd think you'd have little time for casual tea." I constructed my tone as one of expectation - that I expected him to knuckle down and care for her, because that's more or less what he'd just claimed was needed.
Dr. Mesa: "O-Oh, y-yes, of course." He corrected himself and trotted off.
I waited until we were in Dr. Well Wishes' office, with tea and muffins, before I said anything.
K: "That man's a fraud." I stared over the top of my cup.
Well: "Okay. Explain." He shrugged. "We have our differences, K, but I'm not narrowminded enough not to listen."
K: "He's suggesting sedatives, and intentionally phrasing the treatment options to pidgeon-hole me in to accepting that his treatment is the only option available. He showed outright hostility towards the war effort - sound familiar?" I looked right at him. "He openly stated that Fluttershy has little hope of ever being normal again - that she needed *treatment* and not a *cure* and this *treatment* would render her unable to help us not get murdered by Tirek." I sat back in the chair and crossed my arms.
Well: "...you know what, you have a point. I.." He shook his head. "He's the only doctor I know of, in all of Equestria, that's a specialist in this field. More over, I knew him when I was going to Med School. He's brilliant." He shook his head. "But, yes, he did have an ego back then, too..."
K: "How often to ponies stay Blank Flanks into adulthood?" I went for the throat.
Well: "Less than five percent. Perhaps in all of Canterlot and Ponyville, we might have one or tw-" He looked up. "You don't think-?!"
K: "That he's a fraud? A charlatan? A liar that puffed himself up so much because he had nothing else to fall back on? A man - pony - that studied the social arts specifically so he could sound so brilliant, so important, that no one would ever question him? That he can buffalo people with words, because he studied them, and how to induce mass hypnosis?" I sipped the tea. Well Wishes always had excellent black tea in stock. "A Confidence Pony masquerading as a pony of medicine?"
Well: "You.. might have a point, but.." He tilted his head.
K: "I've seen that kind of doublespeak before. Politicians in my world do it all the time, to con people into voting for them, when they're just a bunch of fat pigs at a huge slop trough of our tax dollars they occasionally throw a small crumb to us from." I narrowed my eyes. "You said he's the ONLY expert in Equestria, *right?* So, who could question him? Who could confront him on his theories and treatment procedures? No one!" I pointed downwards at the desk.
Well: "Okay, now you DO have a point. So... what do we do?" He shrugged. "Can you prove he's a fraud?"
K: "I don't think it'd hold up in court, since we have nothing to compare it to." I sighed. "You can't prove malfeasance without a baseline comparison. I have some knowledge of psychology, but no formal education in the field." I made a dismissive hand gesture.
Well: "Huh." He rubbed his fetlock on his chin. "At least I know you have some weaknesses." He tilted his head with a very small touch of sass in his briefly flickered eyes.
K: "Uh-huh. Don't go using that against me." I shrugged. "No, I don't..." I paused. "..we do have an expert in psychology." I suddenly remembered. "I'll be back."
"He" wasn't going to like this. I was sure of it. But, I didn't care. I'd do anything to save my friends.
TIME: 19:04 ERST
LOCATION: Private Social Club, Ponyville
I just went right on in. Screw formality, someone's wellbeing was at stake.
What I found, was The First and Mr. Smith in the foyer, waiting for me.
K: "..aha." I just shook my head. "Prediciton, predestination, or espionage?" I asked.
The First: "A little of the first and last." He tilted his head with a mischevious grin.
Mr. Smith: "And you know already how I feel about this." He stated, flatly.
K: "YOU don't want to get involved. BUT! At the same time, you ALL have a strong sense of justice, and right now, there's a charlatan masquerading as a healer. Something you'd not be too keen to pass up." I smirked.
The First: "Are you SURE you never watched our show?" He chuckled.
K: "I'm sure. And, honestly, I did want to keep you guys out of this, but I haven't anywhere to go-"
Mr. Smith: "And someone you care VERY deeply for, is suffering. Which you can't stand to see." He nodded and adjusted his scarf.
K: "Exactly." I nodded, surely.
Mr. Smith: "You've got me. Despite my better judgment." He shrugged one-leggedly. "Lead On, K----."
[End of Part 3]
Part 4: Harlequin
TIME: 19:47 ERST
DATE: War Day 445/24 Sextus 1003 C.S.
LOCATION: Ponyville General Hospital, Ponyville
In I came with Mr. Smith. Nurse Sweetheart came right up to me. As one of my Rangers, I asked her to watch Dr. Mesa very closely until I returned, and slow walk any of his requests.
Sweetheart: "He's being a pain. This way." She shook her head in frustration, but nodded at Mr. Smith. "Hello, sir! Welcome." And her trademark sweet grin.
She led us to the Psych Unit. Dr. Mesa, however, was cornered! Screw Loose had him up on a shelving unit, and was barking at him.
Screw Loose: *ARF-ARF! GRRRRR!*
K: "Screw!" I spoke, firmly but directly.
Screw Loose: *Arwoo?* And she trotted over, nuzzling my head.
K: "Are you okay, Dr. Mesa?" I asked in an even tone.
Dr. Mesa: "Goodness! Yes, yes, I'm fine. She wouldn't let me near my patient!" He shook his head.
Mr. Smith: "Mm, and for good reason.." He muttered under his breath.
Dr. Mesa: "I tried calling for help, but.. I don't think anyone heard me." He shrugged, and looked at Mr. Smith. "Who is this?"
Mr. Smith: "Oh, just a concerned friend. You know, Screw Loose, here, is VERY perceptive. Her special talent isn't insanity at all - it's the ability to detect those that HAVE a screw loose, as they say.." He looked right at her. "You may drop the act, young lady. Just because you see little need for your talent, is no reason to behave like one of your own would-be patients."
Screw Loose: "Aw.. fa'goo'ness sakes, man! Ya ruined my schtick!" She sounds like Arleen Sorkin. Ho-lee-shit.
K: "Screw?!" I looked down at her.
Screw: "Not even mah real name, shugah." She shook her head. "Just what they called me when I decided ta git locked up heah." She looked at her flank. "Name's Balindra. Balindra Turner."
Turn.. screw.. ball.. ho, it made sense..
Balindra: "That guy's a faker." She nodded at him as she undid her straight jacket herself.
Dr. Mesa: "EXCUSE ME!?" He stormed over to her..
..only for her to fling the straight jacket over his face, tackle him to the ground, BIND him in it, and then tear off his pants.
NO CUTIE MARK! JUST AS I EXPECTED!
Balindra: "Faker, like I said." She looked back up the hall. "DOCTAH WELL WISHES! DOCTAH STABLER! DOCTAH ALLCOME!"
Hearing the new, strange voice, all of them rushed into the room with Nurse Sweetheart, Nurse Coldheart, Big Bricker the Orderly, and Echo Gram, a Medical Technician.
They found me, Dr. Mesa, and Balindra (who was now fixing her mane).. with Dr. Mesa bound up, and his blank flank exposed. Balindra was stuffing his mouth with a surgical mask with her back leg, and I was sticking another one over it so he'd shut up.
Also, Mr. Smith had departed, it seemed..
Dr. Allcome: "K----!" He looked at everything, and shook his head.
Dr. Wishes: "Seems you were right. Screw? What's going on here?" He looked at her.
Balindra: "Name's Balindra Turner. Check with Manehattan University - I graduated six yeah's ago as a physician." She shrugged. "So, that's Doctah Turner." She nodded, and swiped a spare labcoat from a coat hanger. "This guy ovah hea'h's a fraud." She nodded at him. "Total faker." And shook her head.
K: "Okay, then." I shrugged. "Brick, go get me a Gendarmes." I looked at Dr. Mesa. "Just so you know, I'm having you arrested for fraud, and attempting to interfere with the war effort."
Dr. Mesa muffled out a long string of indecipherable expletetives, kicked a little, and looked absolutely furious.
Brick toddled off, shaking his head.
Dr. Turner: "I'd like ta join th' staff hea'h." She shook her head. "My real specialty IS the crazies." And, she shrugged. "No one understood back in Manehattan.. no one got me.. so, I thought I'd pretend to be someone that needed help, ya know? See if you'se could figure it out." She nodded at Dr. Stabler, who DID oversee the ward, but had no talent for it. "You're useless! Bettah surgeon than ya are a head shrink."
Dr. Stabler: "I-I.. never denied that.. but I tried.." He shrugged, defeated.
Dr. Turner: "Nahhh, no worries." She patted him on the shoulder. "You cared enough to try." She looked at me, next. "Why'd you never treat me any different?"
K: "I've.. SEEN the mentally ill. The real depths of human insanity. You were acting harmless, and I thought, malingering." I splayed my hands out, palms up. "Seems I was right, though not as right as I thought."
Dr. Allcome: "Well.. I would like to welcome our new colleague." He nodded to her.
Dr. Stabler: "Indeed. Welcome to Ponyvile Hospital.. as a staff member, not a patient." He grinned warmly. "And let me give you these.." He pulled a key ring off his belt and handed it to her. "..the keys to this ward."
Dr. Well Wishes: "Well! There's a little Friendship and Harmony.. and the Elements aren't even here." He happily tapped his hooves on the ground.
Dour as he might be, at times, he's still a Pony.
Dr. Turner: "Plez'yah t'be hea'h." She drawled out. "An' ta take these off'a'ya hooves." She snatched the keys in her mouth and stuck them in the pocket of her newly borrowed labcoat.
While they were having their little 'Welcome to the Club' cheer session, I excused myself to go to Fluttershy's room.
Inside was Mr. Smith, and a gently sobbing Fluttershy. He had his foreleg over her shoulder, and was talking in low tones. Whether he wanted to get involved or not, he WAS, now. He was saving her from herself, and playing his own role in saving this world.
Whatever intrinsic part of their fabric this world played, whatever the Time Lords really did, here.. I think, now, they (or, he) understood just how much they're still needed. They may abhor violence, they may have their own ways of doing things, but I think it was clear, now, that if they didn't play their own part in this Danse Macabre of war and death, they wouldn't have anything, anywhere, to go, when it was all over.
They were just like the rest of us: Mortal.
[End of Part 4]
Part 5: The Games We Play
TIME: 09:37 ERST
DATE: War Day 447/26 Sextus 1003 C.S.
LOCATION: Sweet Apple Acres, Haltermer County, Kingdom of Equestria
I never DID mention that, technically, the farm wasn't in the city limits, did I? That and, given its proximity to Manehattan, it was technically "upper New York State" in a sense. Remembering, of course, that everthing is twisted and turned, here, with "upper New York State" being somewhat parallel with "Pennsylvania" and "Maryland" and also where "Washington D.C." is.
Actually, if I untwisted the map, Canterlot would be about where Albany is, I think. Interesting, that.
Sextus being the sixth month of the year, this being the 27th Day, it was about June 14th. For apple orchards, this was mainly upkeep season, and I was filling my part in the equation - looking for bugs, and using pesticide on them. The pesticide in question was an all natural thing of Granny's own invention (or, possibly, rediscovery). Works a trick, too.
K: "Sergeant! Apple Horn Worms on the Right Flank!"
Mac: "Ah got'um!"
He snickered and paced over to the tree, spray-gun in hoof. A few shots of the stuff, and I could see them fall dead.
K: "Alright, Soldier, clean up the corpses." I nodded to Applebloom, as I was busy shovelling extra fertilizer.
It's fertilizer. Three guesses. No, I'm not into that stuff, you sick bastards.
Applebloom: "Ah gaw't it!" She was sounding more like her sister every day.
Applejack: "Mmm." She came up by me, and nuzzled. "Can't believe we're gettin' time like this."
K: "Only because war in this world does not move at a lightning pace. More help is needed in Neighpon - ponies, weapons, supplies. We have to prepare equipment to send to other allies and dependant nations until their parent nations can equip them properly. You're pregnant. There's so much logistical stuff going on - and we have to maintain an alert status, in case Tirek or one of his minions tries something. He just lost Grogar, probably his strongest and most loyal lieutenant. He's got to be thinking about how he can get us back for that." I shrugged. "Plus.. Fluttershy." I shrugged.
She'd been allowed out of the Hospital the same evening we confronted Dr. Mesa. Barn Mesa was now facing serious felony charges, too, and his license to practise medicine had been suspended until an investigation (headed by Wide Lens and Chemical Splash) was complete. Fluttershy was at home, now, but under constant monitoring. One of the girls was with her at all times, or Lyra, Octavia, Scratch, Colgate, or one of the Flower Girls.
She was still a mess. No two ways about it. After what she'd been through, who could blame her? She was resilient, but for the last year and change, she'd been the Universe's latrine door mat - always getting the shit kicked out of her.
According to Octavia, she was having crazy nightmares. Always about her being raped. She'd wake up crying, take a shower, and go back to bed. It was terrible, but she was working through it as best she could.
I moved towards the edge of the field, still spreading pony nightsoil everywhere that was needed, making sure to check the trees.. taking a glance at the woods, on occasion, wondering if anything in there wanted me dead.
*Skeee!*
A tiny wail. What was this? I set the manure bag down, took my gloves off, and paced towards the woods, hand resting on the M-19.
When I got to the woods, I found a pair of Ferrets trying their best to catch a small bunny. The bunny was smart, though, and kept avoiding them, but was running out of maneuvring room. I reflected that the circle of life was the same here as it was back home.
That is, until, the bunny broke and ran right over towards me, and just about leapt into my arms. I caught it, and the Ferrets stopped just short of us.
K: "Scram!" I waved at the tiny predators.
Obediently, they scurried off.
I looked down at the little bunny. Female, not a year old yet, scared as heck, and grasping me for dear life. Much like Angel used to, in a way..
K: "Would you like a home? And a friend?" I looked down at her.
The bunny beamed a grin, and nodded.
I was a glutton for punishment.
TIME: 11:17 ERST
LOCATION: Fluttershy's Cabin
This time, I came with a guard. Big Mac, and just to be on the safe side, Lyra. I was NOT going to take a chance on another attempted rape, even if she WAS getting better.
K: "Knock-knock!" I announced as I entered.
Fluttershy: "Oh! O-oh, K." She bowed her head and almost retreated into a little ball.
K: "Brought you a friend. Her name's Harmony Bunny." I held up the little bun-let.
Fluttershy: "OH!" She zoomed over, and gently picked the bunny up in her fetlocks, giving her a small hug. "You look hungry! Don't worry, Momma's gonna feed you. Come on.."
And just like that, we were ignored. Totally, completely ignored.
Lyra: "Ah k'em all th' way out here fer this?" She had a frowny-smirk, like, this would be funnier if it happened to someone else.
Mac: "Mm'yup!" He chortled.
K: "Well, she's clearly in her own space, now. Let's go, guys."
With that, we departed, walking along the trail road back to town.
Lyra: "Well.. now that ah've got th' chance, K, I wahnted ta bring some things up." She shrugged. "Ya know how ye got me searchin' through ancient texts n' stuff, lookin' fer clues?" She trotted along on my right side, wearing only her Ranger shirt.
K: "Go on." I was strolling.. casually strolling.. for once.
Lyra: "Welp. Ah found somethin' amazin'.." She looked up at Mac, and shrugged. "Eh.. nae matter, c'mon." She nodded towards her place.
K: "What was THAT all about?" I looked at Mac.
Mac: "Round Two, bro, but I'm bein' a chaperone." He smirked.
K: "Really, Lyra! You and Gaze!" I pointed out.
Lyra: "Aye, so? Ye got t'me first, Monkey Sex God." She giggled banally, then stuck her tongue out at us both. "C'moooon, laaaads! E's jes' a JOKE!"
Mac: "Heh... good one." He smirked.
K: "I guess..?" I shrugged. "Eh, as long as you're not serious."
Lyra: "Nae! I been there, fingered tha', an' besides, I'm more intae Bon-Bon than ye." She tilted her head. "No offense, K, but ye gots some ladies in yer stables." She nuzzled under my hand. "Ye make a fine friend, tho'.." A warmth was in that. A closeness.
Mac: "She's got ya there, Bro." He grinned broadly.
K: "I really like you, too, Lyra. And not in that way, even though it was fun." I gave her a grin. "Sooo.. what's this about you finding something?"
Lyra: "Aye! C'me on, then!" She took off at a fast trot, which to me, is a very fast walk.
Back at her place, Bon-Bon apparently heard her come in, and walked out of the bedroom in a schoolfilly outfit..
Bon-Bon: "OHMYGOODNESS!" She went DARK red.
K: "Now, now! I'm here with Mac. This ISN'T a social call!" I pointed a finger at her.
Mac: "Mmm... if I wasn't datin'.." He tilted his head far to the side, to examine her like any red-blooded straight male might.
Lyra: "AH! Bon-Bon! Ahh-eh-ehah-I'm so sorry! I dinnae expect t'bring back K an' Mac! Ah'eh'ehm... I-I was.. what I meant by 'something special' was.. uhuhm... NOT wi' them!" She was on her hind legs, talking with her forehooves, and gesturing at us frantically, also very red.
K: "Now, hold on.. I mean, are you two sure?" I looked at both of them, because, after the position Lyra put me in last year, I wanted a bit of good-hearted revenge. "I mean, I can pleasure your Goddesses. Come ON. I can easily take both of you at once, AND I have backup - the only Stallion I can safely touch balls with and it NOT be gay, my own brother-in-law." I put my hands on my hips, fixing them both with a cocky stare. "C'mon, bro, about time I got you some Prench Bennies.." I gave a side-long nod in his direction.
Mac: *Snort*Snicker* "Yeah, sure, bro!" *BHAAHHAAH!* "THEIR FACES, BROTHER! THEIR FACES!"
Bon-Bon: "K! MAC! YOU.. YOU..." She flung a couch pillow at each of us, the look on her face a mixture between horror, humiliation and quite possibly insulted arousal.
Lyra: "K!!! MAC! AH'M GUN'TA TELL APPLEJACK ON BOTH A YE!" She was more furious than humiliated.
She grabbed the pillows when they hit the ground, with her telekinesis, and thumped us with them. Repeatedly. Mac and I rolled on the ground, laughing, not defending ourselves.
After a few moments, though, both sides let up.
K: "I-I'm sorry, Bon. You got caught in the crossfire." I looked at Lyra with a smirk. "Revenge complete."
Lyra: "I-.. OH!" She said, suddenly remembering WHY I'd want it in the first place. "Ah'ch.. yea'.. arreight.. ye got me." She shook her head and smiled.
Bon-Bon: "I don't get it." She shrugged with a harumph.
K: "Lyra put me in a very tight spot a year ago, at the beginning of the war. She.. borderline raped me, and we swore never to talk about it. Applejack found out. While she forgave me, and understood, I never felt quite right about it." I shrugged. "I apologize to you, Bon-Bon, for catching you in the blast."
Bon-Bon: "LYRA!" She narrowed her eyes at the Irish-accented one.
Lyra: "Ehhh... aye, an' it were some FINE sex, honey, I swear.." She rolled her eyes with a grin. "But, ah'm over it." She shrugged. "Ah guess ah'm sorry, too, honey." She walked over and gave her a peck on the cheek.
Gaze's head peeked out from around the corner by the bedroom... just the edge of it.
Gaze: "Dah'th thi'th mean no th'ree'thom?" The one eye that came around the edge, looked right at me. "Th'orry, th'ir.. Orgy."
Lyra: *Nonchalant* "Aye, Gaze, orgy's cancelled. Bon, be a dear and help him out of the bit-and-bridle?" She smiled sweetly, then made that sweetness into sass and flirtation as she turned to look at both Mac and me.
Mac: "O-oh.. my.." HE BLUSHED!
K: "Pony Bondage, Bro?" I looked at him.
Lyra: "Aye. A rather common fetish, ac'shul'ee.." She sauntered over and flicked her tail under Mac's chin. "Seems he's part'o the Leather Ridin' Club. Ay'll haf'ta tell Cheerilee.."
Mac: *Coff* "N-No need.." He lowered his gaze.
K: "And I thought I was bad." I shrugged, non-plussed.
Gaze came around the corner fully, at this point, naked. Not that nudity mattered to ponies. It was no different than a human dressing in pyjamas or other similar hyper-casual outfits.
Gaze: "Ehm.. suh!" He nodded, uncomfortably.
K: "I know, I know, you're not into Stallions." I shrugged, still casual about all this. "We're friends, Gaze. I don't and couldn't think of you - or Mac - that way without feeling incredibly wrong, somehow." A wide shrug. "If we're done with the Adult Situations... Lyra? What was that thing you wanted to show me?"
Lyra: "Right! On'tae bizness.." She said, well over the whole embarassment.
She walked over (like a human, she's been practicing) to her bookshelf, and pulled out a box that I knew hadn't been there a year ago. She grabbed it (in both fetlocks) and walked over to me, setting it down, and opening it up.
Inside was something I recognized from my childhood. The same color, the same shape, the same thickness. Gingerly, I picked it up and examined it, looking at the faded, but still readable text on the front.
GameColt.
It was a god-damned GameBoy.
My breathing grew shallow and rapid as I gently flipped it over, and fondled the battery compartment tab, and flicked it open. Inside were no batteries, but, there was no sign that the leads had become corroded from battery acid. Meaning, when this thing was discarded, it was done so with no batteries inside.
Also in the box were three games. Teris, which was a VERY strange coincidence, and two games that just about gave me a heart attack. "Super Fluttershy Land" and "Super Fluttershy Land 2: The 6 Golden Tiaras."
K: "HOW!? HOW!?" I was shaking.
Lyra: "Ah'dun'tknow.." She was suddenly humbled, almost afraid. "Look'it th' markin's on th' back."
I flipped the cartidges over to read the copyright information.
"Copyright 1989, Coltendo of Harmonia."
"Copyright 1990, Coltendo of Harmonia. Produced under license."
"Copyright 1992, Coltendo of Harmonia. Produced under license, Brighteye Entertainment of Harmonia."
Tetris, Super Fluttershy Land, and Fluttershy Land 2.
K: "BRIGHT EYES! OF COURSE!" I exclaimed.
Everyone looked at me like I was a million miles away.
K: "Bright Eyes was the de facto leader of the Generation 2 ponies. She was the smart one, the inventor. The one kids were supposed to emulate the most, I guess. If.. things.. here.. are JUST that different from my world.. an artifact like this makes perfect sense! What if.. what if Bright Eyes somehow had a clue about the future, and was trying to.. I don't know.." I shrugged. "Say something about it?"
Gaze: "Y'mean.. Bright Eyes were tryin'ta warn us?" He tilted his head.
K: "Genius is rarely recognized in its own time." I shook my head. "No, I think if she had any idea disaster was coming, she tried to warn ponies, got brushed off, got smart, and went commercial. She commercialized her ideas and concepts to sell to the masses. Something to get her thoughts out there in a digestable format while making the almighty dollar..." I trailed off. "Would she be paranoid enough to.." I remembered Dream Castle, and the rough bunker underneath. "..if she understood that megadisaster has a way of occurring with regularity to your kind every few thousand years, would she prepare for it??"
Gaze: "Ah'dunno, suh." He shrugged.
Bon-Bon: "I think she would." She was suddenly inflective, but just for a moment.
K: "Guys, this is a clue to find Coltonville!" I gestured at the GameColt. "With that kind of technology, dealing with Tirek would be a breeze. At the same time, if HE got his hands on it.."
Mac: "We'd be doomed." He shrugged. "We gotta find this Coltonville place."
K: "Agreed. For now, though.." I shook my head. "..Lyra, where did you get this?"
Lyra: "Welp.. ye'll never believe it, but Gaze an' Bon-Bon an' I got it on a trip to Detrot recently! Some trader came through, set up in th' market place, an' was dealin' in rare goods. Th' box? Would'nae open it. He said th' air would damage its mints.." She shrugged and shook her head.
K: "Damage.. its mint condition.." I corrected. "What race was he?"
Lyra: "That's the thing.. he were wearin' a cloak an' kept behin' a counter.. I could'nae tell." She looked at Gaze.
Gaze: "No clue, suh. Two legger, though, fer sure." He nodded. "Spoke.. normal. Nothin' unusual." He shrugged.
K: "Can.. you think we can find him?" I shrugged.
Lyra: "Nae. We had th' bits t'buy this, but when I went back after hittin' up th' bank fer more bits, he was gone." She sighed. "I asked the Gendarmes in Detrot to keep an eye out for him, but.." She shook her head. "..we got this a month ago. While you were still held pris'ner." She gave me a sympathetic look. "It.. kinda r'minded me of ye, K----." She'd never called me by my full name before.
K: "Just in case I was dead, you wanted something to remember me by." I smiled. "Thanks, Lyra."
Lyra: "Anyhoo.. issa clue, aye?" She tilted her head.
K: "It is. Anything else?"
Lyra: "Gaze found this inna Detrot library."
She went over to the book shelf again, and pulled out a very thick book. It had.. symbols I recognized on it. Road sign symbols.
Gaze: "Title'a th' book is 'Laws of the Road.' It's transcribed, suh."
I took the book and opened it, reading the laboriously carefully transcribed letters. It looked like whomever did it, actually traced over the letters from the original book. It was 'written' in a font very close to Times New Roman.
K: "Copyright date.. 1993, Republic of Harmonia Department of Transportation, Roadways and Railsystems." I blinked. "They had a republican form of government, not a kingdom. All this time, we called them the Empire of Harmony, when, in reality, they were originally a republic." I took a moment to consider what this meant.
Gaze: "Look'it Page 67, suh." He nodded sagely.
Sure enough, on Page 67, was instructions on how to read a map. And it INCLUDED A MAP OF THE REGION AROUND COLTONVILLE! Complete with roadways, elevation, historical markings, the whole nine yards and then some End Zone.
K: "By God." I was stunned. "Paradise Estates is marked on this map. It even includes a scale to show distances in MILES.." I looked up at them. "And you use the Metric System!"
Gaze: "Unicorns did, first, suh." He gave a tiny smug look, then frowned. "Prol'em is, I gots no idea what a 'mile' means."
Bon-Bon: "Yeah, around here, a mile is used as the same word as a kilometer, just an informal saying of it. A country mile is considered to be a bit more than one and a half kilometers." She chimed in, noting this.
I tilted my head. Waaaiiit a second...
K: "OR.. roughly the same distance as an actual MILE! One mile is one-point-six-one (1.61) kilometers! FASCINATING! As your variant of English evolved, terms came to mean slightly different things. In this case, your language internalized the term 'country mile' to mean roughly the same as an old mile under what we call the Imperial or Standard Measurement system in my world." I looked at Gaze. "What's'it called here?"
Gaze: "Imperial. Suh. And it's got a roight nasty bit o' sublime insult to it when ya says it li' tha'." He nodded slowly.
K: "This map.. may have just given us victory." I looked up at them. "It's time to start another Expedition of Discovery."
The keys were all right here. Ancient knowledge passed down through the ages in the most esoteric forms. Slight liberties granted here and there, but the past of their world seemed to align with the past of my own. What did this mean? What would we find in Ancient Coltonville?
Only one way to find out.
{End of Chapter 44}
